Catastrophizing Sucks

Musings of an Aspie

Catastrophizing is one of those autistic traits that when I first read about it, I thought, “Oh, I never do that.”

How wrong I was.

I catastrophize daily. It’s usually small stuff that blows over quickly–I’m not going to get to the post office before it closes which means I won’t get my important overnight package and I’ll have to go back tomorrow and everything will be delayed and I should have left home sooner and why did I take a right out of the parking garage instead of a left because taking a right always means waiting in more traffic even though it’s more direct well obviously it’s because I’m stupid and don’t think things through so it’s my fault if I get there too late but maybe I’ll be able to beg one of the workers who’s closing up to get my package because that worked once before…

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What My Bike Has Taught Me About White Privilege

Understanding White Priviledge: Being black is just like riding a bike? Well not really, but it’s a good analogy.

A Little More Sauce

The phrase “white privilege” is one that rubs a lot of white people the wrong way. It can trigger something in them that shuts down conversation or at least makes them very defensive. (Especially those who grew up relatively less privileged than other folks around them). And I’ve seen more than once where this happens and the next move in the conversation is for the person who brought up white privilege to say, “The reason you’re getting defensive is because you’re feeling the discomfort of having your privilege exposed.”

I’m sure that’s true sometimes. And I’m sure there are a lot of people, white and otherwise, who can attest to a kind of a-ha moment or paradigm shift where they “got” what privilege means and they did realize they had been getting defensive because they were uncomfortable at having their privilege exposed. But I would guess that more often than…

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Who Can I Relate To On TV?

Well there’s not any characters I identify with who look like me (my sister says it’s Huey on Boondocks, but that’s a cartoon). Let’s just say I’d like to make all business associates, family members and every potential suitor sit through marathons of Bones, Criminal Minds and Big Bang Theory… With the following instructions:

Please write a one page summary of each of my three favorite characters. Explain what you do and don’t like about each one and if you think you could work well with them. What is special about them and what is annoying? Why? How would you handle each scenario you find annoying? What would you add to or do to help enrich their lives, make them feel comfortable and help them succeed?

This would be a fun exercise… But in reality, these characteristics look very different on a black female and are not at all received well by black men (not that I limit myself, I think all peoples are beautiful, but that is my culture and experience). I might be in trouble with some folks merely for having the audacity to say I identify only with three white characters who hold multiple PhD’s. But they may not know, I will have my first one soon and I’ve always lived in diverse areas (and by diverse I mean I was often the only Afro-American).

This is where our similarities split; the upbringing of a brown skinned female with these traits is not one that people celebrate, encourage or ever think will amount to anything. No one tested me for genius and I only found out that I am high on the spectrum for Apergers at the age of 42. I’ve been to 6 colleges and every one led to financial troubles, including the one I attended while working full time as a Bank Manager, and graduated from, Magna Cume Laude.

Now that I have been officially diagnosed (I’ve known since I knew what Asperger was), I function even better… But the hard times, bullying, criticism, and lack of understanding hurts worse. I never expected anyone to care before. Now it’s like there’s some false sense of special needs consideration, which really only applies to people who are disfigured or visibly disabled, that everyone says exists but really doesn’t… Unless you want to walk around looking pitiful and reminding people evrytime they trample all over your personal space, quiet time, privacy and even basic human rights.

How do you feel about these characters? Would you see Bones the same if she wasn’t white? Would Sheldon be as popular if he were female. Would Reid be as adorable if he were a brown skinned woman with untamed, natural, curly hair?

If these folks weren’t PhD’s do you think they would be able to get hired and maintain a career? Would they function well in corporate 9-5, manual labor, in a box, not using their gifts or just taking orders?

Next time you have a conflict with someone who reminds you of one of these characters, consider how high their IQ is, how hard they are trying to make you feel comfortable and that they really can’t help your perceived lack of social etiquette.

[Character Info from Wikipedia.com]

Dr. Temperance Brennan

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Throughout the course of the series, Brennan is portrayed as a straightforward, brilliant anthropologist, who lacks social skills. Her social ineptitude is especially apparent when it comes to sarcasm, metaphors which she often interprets literally, and pop culture jokes and is often the source of comedy in the show. An example of this is when she mistakes Colin Farrell for Will Ferrell.

Dr. Spencer Reid

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As is characteristic of people with Asperger’s Syndrome, Reid is socially awkward. He often fixates on things (prompting Morgan and other team members to have to tell him to be quiet), and misses social cues at times (for example, unknowingly changing the subject of a conversation). The Unknown Subject (“UnSub”) in “Broken Mirror” noted this, and Gubler stated in an interview in the show’s second season “[Reid]’s an eccentric genius, with hints of schizophrenia and minor autism, Asperger’s Syndrome. Reid is 30 years old with three Ph.D.s and one can not usually achieve that without some form of autism.” Writer Sharon Lee Watson stated in a twitter chat Reid’s Asperger traits makes the character more lovable.

Dr. Sheldon Cooper

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Sheldon is a theoretical physicist at Caltech who shares an apartment with his colleague and best friend, Leonard Hofstadter (Johnny Galecki). He is a former child prodigy with genius level IQ, but displays an almost total lack of social skills, a tenuous understanding of humor, and difficulty recognizing irony and sarcasm in other people, although he himself often employs them. He exhibits highly idiosyncratic and narcissistic behavior and a general lack of humility or empathy. These characteristics provide the majority of the humor involving him, which has caused him to be described as the show’s breakout character.Despite speculation that Sheldon’s personality traits may be consistent with Asperger syndrome, obsessive–compulsive personality disorder and asexuality, co-creator Bill Prady has repeatedly stated that Sheldon’s character was neither conceived nor developed with regard to any of these traits.

Huey Freeman
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Let’s discuss it… http://xeeme.com/AndréaRaquel

The Revolution of the Data Slaves

#TakeBackControl #RespectNetwork be informed.

Petervan

Revolution Data Slaves

Some years ago, when Facebook “only” had 356M users, I remember Marc Zuckerberg saying:

“… changing the privacy options of 356M users overnight, that’s not something everybody would do. Well, we decided to do it, and to decide what are the social norms.”

But who decides those social norms?

In my opinion it’s not normal or desirable that we leave those decisions to powerhouses with commercial interests like Facebook, Google, or any other “siren servers” like your health insurance company, your bank, your retailer, or even your government. These norms should be given back to the commons, with equal rights, obligation and benefits for all parties in the data-ecosystem, from providers of services and products, to data-intermediaries, and including the end-users.

Armitage_Siren

“Siren servers” was a term coined by Jaron Lanier in his seminal book “Who owns the Future?” It reminded me of the master-slave relationship spelled out by Doc Searls…

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Getting Your Nonprofit Act Together …

People support causes, not institutions… great blog!

THE STRATEGIC LEARNER

“People support causes, and not institutions.” …

Cause Manifesto Poster 400px overlay

Some of you already know of my background in both professional and volunteer non-profit environments in social services, higher education, and healthcare.  I guess you could call me a “Do Gooder“, who has experienced first-hand the need to bring more to the game than just a desire to do good work to succeed.

So you’ll understand why I am very excited about Brian Sooy’s new and extremely valuable book “Raise Your Voice”: A Cause Manifesto”.  At first, I thought that this would be another fairly short, enjoyable book to read in a few nights. 

A week later, I am still digesting all the important and useful information in this little title.

“We’re informed by what speaks to our minds and thoughts; we’re inspired by what appeal to our hearts.”

Brian is speaking to both my brain and my heart …

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I Call B.S. On All Cancer Research and Regulatory Agencies

If I disappear after making this statement, y’all come looking for me! Hopefully since I’m not making any claims to sell anything, I’m safe… and since we are finally telling the truth about sugar, I hope we can talk about this too. My money is on Dr. Sanjay Gupta.

I call B.S. on the FDA, Susan G. Komen, the FTC and any other organization claiming to be searching for cures and being guardians of our health. WTF????????!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, there is no proof. So let’s get some! I think we’ve raised enough money for cancer research to either dispel or prove the effects of this fruit. It’s been around forever, so that means we’ve had plenty of time for the test cases to have died or been cured. No longer, since the age of the Internet, can we act like folks in 3rd world countries are somehow less knowledgeable about nature, natural cures and old fashioned down home remedies. Everything we do comes from them or a laboratory mimicking them. Somebody, anybody, help me understand why we don’t have some scientific research one way or the other. It makes me wonder if there is a fraud being perpetrated in the name of profit.

This is not a hoax. I told y’all I would do some more research and I did. Now I’m calling B.S. on all US agencies who claim to not know. It’s time to know. Don’t go to the doctor again for any chemical treatment for cancer without checking this out… it’s worth a move, vacation or sabbatical to one of these countries to find out. It will probably cost you less than your hospital bill and funeral.

Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center claims Neurotoxicity ***I call B.S.*** “alkaloids extracted from graviola may cause neuronal dysfunction and degeneration leading to symptoms of Parkinson’s disease”. The compound annonacin, which is contained in the seeds of soursop, is a neurotoxin associated with neurodegenerative disease, and research has suggested a connection between consumption of soursop and atypical forms of Parkinson’s disease due to high concentrations of annonacin.

The French food safety agency says no ***I still call B.S. Where’s the further study?*** “concluded that, based on the available research findings, “it is not possible to confirm that the observed cases of atypical Parkinson syndrome […] are linked to the consumption of Annona muricata,” calling for further study on potential risks to human health.

The Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center ***Sounds like propaganda to me*** “list cancer treatment as one of the “purported uses” of soursop.

Cancer Research UK, ***Tried to make it sound like a hoax.*** “Many sites on the internet advertise and promote graviola capsules as a cancer cure, but none of them are supported by any reputable scientific cancer organisations” and “there is no evidence to show that graviola works as a cure for cancer” and consequently they do not support its use as a treatment for cancer.

***And threw someone in jail!*** In 2008 a court case relating to the sale in the UK of Triamazon (the pill form), a soursop product, resulted in the criminal conviction of a man under the terms of the UK Cancer Act for offering to treat people for cancer. A spokesman for the council that instigated the action stated, “it is as important now as it ever was that people are protected from those peddling unproven products with spurious claims as to their effects.”

The Federal Trade Commission in the United States ***Is the worst.*** They’re the ones who were supposed to govern financial securities remember? Ooopps! “determined that there was “no credible scientific evidence” that the extract of soursop sold by Bioque Technologies “can prevent, cure, or treat cancer of any kind.”

Now I’m not claiming anything about this fruit. I’ve never even seen it. But if I had unlimited resources and the federal license to do so… you best believe I’d be in a lab doing some research. I’ve lost too many loved ones to Cancer to at least not want to know the truth.

Here is a bit of info to help you on your discovery:

  1. yes you can buy the seeds.
  2. yes it is available and grown in the US.
  3. here are some of the names graviola, guyabanana, guyabano, soursop.
  4. here’s the wikileak, I mean link, that I referenced to show how easily the info can be found, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soursop

What say you????????

#LivingSugarFree How Do You Become The Person You Were Meant To Be?

I know this is a phrase you’re used to seeing a lot in self help marketing ads: “become the person you were meant to be…”

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News flash: This statement implies destiny.

If you believe in destiny than you know that God knows you, where you are and where you are going. If you don’t believe in destiny than you shouldn’t be looking for anything that was meant to be and should be okay with just being.

I am here to tell you, you are already the person you were meant to be, as will you be 10 years from now when you evolve and grow more.

You don’t need to become anyone… you just need to tell the person you are to get up and do something with what you have right now! Only then will you feel like you are the person you were meant to be.

If you wait for some major change, before you take action, you will never see who you are meant to be.

Let’s discuss it… http://xeeme.com/Andréa Raquel