S.H.E. Opportunity Killers

Oh you like that title, huh? Yes, I know I’m clever 😉 Spite, Hate and Envy are terrible joy stealers, relationship destroyers, and opportunity killers.

I’m a psychology researcher, coach, mentor and advisor…  unintentional kindling the hate fire is what I do, it is my weirdness. I call it hater aiding 😀 But there’s a fine line. When you say something profound, do something really great or really smart or accomplish something and then you celebrate really big and care about the fact that it makes the people who are jealous more frustrated. That’s pretty much the same thing as “watching them squirm” and shouldn’t really be motivation; but hey I understand that we’re human. I’m not saying what anyone should or shouldn’t do; I’m just offering a perspective that may help with easing some of that frustration.
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Have you ever become friends with your neighborhood bully, the boss nobody liked or someone that was hating on you? It’s an interesting test of patience, forgiveness and leadership. How much more to serve them? I do it everyday. The key for me is remembering my why. The Bible says if I do it for them I have my reward, that’s whether I’m getting accolades or hate. I have been delivered from the opinions of people, truly. That is why I can laugh at it, discuss it and yes help others overcome. We throw around “to each his own” but what about live and let live?… even for the hater. I can’t stress the importance of being open to discussion, and not being quick to ignore people who are in your network. Now saying you aren’t going to associate with someone because they did something is not the same as saying you are going to ignore them because of their personality or feelings towards you. I don’t have to be around you, but if I’m going to be around you I can’t ignore you because that would be rude on my part and who’s to say you deserve that.

Anybody know what the Socratic Method is??? If I tell you what I want you to think, I’m being controlling. If I ask you a series of questions to make you reveal to yourself that what you are saying is not logical, than you gained the information on your own. I find it to be quite helpful when dealing with haters, and other folks who are not on the same page. “Haters” we toss that term around a lot, and I’m a jokester so I make light of serious social issues. But ultimately all humans have the capacity for jealousy, envy and spite. Most do it more often when no one is looking. The problem with social media is that often people forget that someone is always looking. So even ignoring someone is an action. Life is 20% what happens to me and 80% how I respond to it. How I respond to the hater is always going to be bigger than how I perceive the hater treated me. So why ignore them and why not just choose your network and online and off more wisely. Therefore you don’t have people in your circles that are blatantly prejudice,  mean, derailing, selfish and sabotaging… these are action words whereas hatred, jealousy, and envy are feeling words and subject to opinion. That is what we all agree haters are, right? Everyone that I might think is hating on me, is not necessarily. Sometimes they just have hang ups. The point is, who am I to be rude, disrespectful or less than myself to the hater. I never know why God may have brought me into their life.

#TXNL is a pretty big online network, even if you only count active fans and subscribers… I only have 400 FB friends and the majority is family, classmates, and coworkers from past jobs. I literally know almost everyone in person or via phone. It allows me to be accessible to my entire network on a schedule and limited to our online spaces. I can share content when I want and support members when I have time. I’m very good at managing my time and resources.

You’d be surprised at some of the online secrets I’ve learned. For example, I use to create Facebook groups from my fan page and then add the friends from my friend wall. That allows me to post as my page and so people notice my page more from the large groups we have. Well before lots of folks could catch on to that trick, Facebook shut it down. I think maybe it was a glitch. They will probably offer it as a paid service to pages. LOL!!!

Anywho. My point is that, y’all don’t have to like me, I love you. If you disrespect me with your actions I will let you know because maybe you are unaware, uneducated, unskilled, uncivilized and etc. That’s what leaders do, and I come from a good stock, breeding and training of great leaders so it’s ingrained in me to teach. The teacher, leader, actress, singer, speaker, comedian, preacher, remember I’m the coaches coach, doesn’t have time to be mad about their haters. But intentionally setting out to be rude? I may have deleted someone from my FB friend list. But if they follow me on Twitter I will follow back and if they tweet me I will say thank you. Doesn’t mean I’m hanging out with them for dinner. But guess what if they ask me, I will have to consider. As long as they don’t mind my sugar free way of letting them know they are being disrespectful. I’m perfectly okay with giving them the benefit of the doubt that they were not hating.

If you choose to ignore good sense, via any social platform I will unfollow and disengage because I don’t endorse foolishness. Oh, I’ve seen it all, the motivational speaker who was nasty and insulting to me, the coach who only wanted to take everyone’s money, the person who was trying to push their agenda, the con artist, etc. If I know you I will not publicly ignore you, heckle you, or try to embarrass you, like I don’t know you just because I think you are a hater, or rude or weird… that could go for any of us based on a judgement call.

Like I said, live and let live… may God use me to bless my haters too.

I Call B.S. On All Cancer Research and Regulatory Agencies

If I disappear after making this statement, y’all come looking for me! Hopefully since I’m not making any claims to sell anything, I’m safe… and since we are finally telling the truth about sugar, I hope we can talk about this too. My money is on Dr. Sanjay Gupta.

I call B.S. on the FDA, Susan G. Komen, the FTC and any other organization claiming to be searching for cures and being guardians of our health. WTF????????!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, there is no proof. So let’s get some! I think we’ve raised enough money for cancer research to either dispel or prove the effects of this fruit. It’s been around forever, so that means we’ve had plenty of time for the test cases to have died or been cured. No longer, since the age of the Internet, can we act like folks in 3rd world countries are somehow less knowledgeable about nature, natural cures and old fashioned down home remedies. Everything we do comes from them or a laboratory mimicking them. Somebody, anybody, help me understand why we don’t have some scientific research one way or the other. It makes me wonder if there is a fraud being perpetrated in the name of profit.

This is not a hoax. I told y’all I would do some more research and I did. Now I’m calling B.S. on all US agencies who claim to not know. It’s time to know. Don’t go to the doctor again for any chemical treatment for cancer without checking this out… it’s worth a move, vacation or sabbatical to one of these countries to find out. It will probably cost you less than your hospital bill and funeral.

Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center claims Neurotoxicity ***I call B.S.*** “alkaloids extracted from graviola may cause neuronal dysfunction and degeneration leading to symptoms of Parkinson’s disease”. The compound annonacin, which is contained in the seeds of soursop, is a neurotoxin associated with neurodegenerative disease, and research has suggested a connection between consumption of soursop and atypical forms of Parkinson’s disease due to high concentrations of annonacin.

The French food safety agency says no ***I still call B.S. Where’s the further study?*** “concluded that, based on the available research findings, “it is not possible to confirm that the observed cases of atypical Parkinson syndrome […] are linked to the consumption of Annona muricata,” calling for further study on potential risks to human health.

The Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center ***Sounds like propaganda to me*** “list cancer treatment as one of the “purported uses” of soursop.

Cancer Research UK, ***Tried to make it sound like a hoax.*** “Many sites on the internet advertise and promote graviola capsules as a cancer cure, but none of them are supported by any reputable scientific cancer organisations” and “there is no evidence to show that graviola works as a cure for cancer” and consequently they do not support its use as a treatment for cancer.

***And threw someone in jail!*** In 2008 a court case relating to the sale in the UK of Triamazon (the pill form), a soursop product, resulted in the criminal conviction of a man under the terms of the UK Cancer Act for offering to treat people for cancer. A spokesman for the council that instigated the action stated, “it is as important now as it ever was that people are protected from those peddling unproven products with spurious claims as to their effects.”

The Federal Trade Commission in the United States ***Is the worst.*** They’re the ones who were supposed to govern financial securities remember? Ooopps! “determined that there was “no credible scientific evidence” that the extract of soursop sold by Bioque Technologies “can prevent, cure, or treat cancer of any kind.”

Now I’m not claiming anything about this fruit. I’ve never even seen it. But if I had unlimited resources and the federal license to do so… you best believe I’d be in a lab doing some research. I’ve lost too many loved ones to Cancer to at least not want to know the truth.

Here is a bit of info to help you on your discovery:

  1. yes you can buy the seeds.
  2. yes it is available and grown in the US.
  3. here are some of the names graviola, guyabanana, guyabano, soursop.
  4. here’s the wikileak, I mean link, that I referenced to show how easily the info can be found, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soursop

What say you????????

Walmart #ScamAlert #FDIC

Don’t fall for @Walmart’s scam, advertising a black card. They take your money without telling you that you can’t get cash for 2 weeks until your permanent card arrives.

But the real question is why are they not telling you that when they sign you up. Yeah yeah, we I know about the fine print. But how many of my clients do you think read and/or understand the fine print. Then the customer service agent who barely speaks English has to put you on hold 10 times to explain that to you. Wait, there’s more.

When the manager who also speaks poor English gets on the line…
1. He asks what the you need the cash for.
2. Then he proceeds to educate you that all temporary debit cards issued in the US right now have a stipulation that doesn’t allow cash withdrawals.

Huh??? That’s when I lost it and took the phone. Now he wants to escalate after we explained the nice little advertisement we’d be posting to help them out.

A debit card means you can can withdraw, but that’s not what this is. This is you investing in Walmart and helping them build interest, plain and simple.

Don’t fall for companies who pretend to be helping the masses. They are not! You may as well deal with a bank, which is FDIC insured and can’t pull a fast one. Highly disappointed in Wally World. I will not shop there again in spite of the fact that it is the closest store to my house.

Let’s discuss it… http://xeeme.com/AndréaRaquel

Talking Over Your Own Head | You Might Be A PorchMonkey

From #LivingSugarFree

If you don’t understand marketing or business in general, let me help you.
Either play along for the sake of discussion, be supportive, ad value, or keep your mouth shut and avoid looking like a fool…
Continue reading

#LivingSugarFree How Do You Become The Person You Were Meant To Be?

I know this is a phrase you’re used to seeing a lot in self help marketing ads: “become the person you were meant to be…”

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News flash: This statement implies destiny.

If you believe in destiny than you know that God knows you, where you are and where you are going. If you don’t believe in destiny than you shouldn’t be looking for anything that was meant to be and should be okay with just being.

I am here to tell you, you are already the person you were meant to be, as will you be 10 years from now when you evolve and grow more.

You don’t need to become anyone… you just need to tell the person you are to get up and do something with what you have right now! Only then will you feel like you are the person you were meant to be.

If you wait for some major change, before you take action, you will never see who you are meant to be.

Let’s discuss it… http://xeeme.com/Andréa Raquel

#LivingSugarFree Never Been Big On Popularity Contests

I caught this recent Mashable article about Klout on Twitter “How to Improve Your Klout Score — and Why You Should Bother

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News flash:
Being mindful of your influence is not the same as being mindful of a an external score. There are multiple ways to determine quality influence. In the old days we just did surveys… oh wait, there’s an app for that. If all you care about is numbers… and you don’t really care what your audience is gaining from you,  or who is growing, surviving and touching others because of you, I can’t help you.

How do I know the scores and the websites they are based on are flawed? Because I’m a researcher and I pay attention and get to the heart of a matter without being emotional. I watch, I ask and I listen… imagine that as a concept.

Now I get on my Social Entrepreneur soapbox…
To focus on comparison ratings is to worry about someone elses success. Yes it’s nice to be the top ranked blahbedyblah. Been there done that, got the t-shirt.

Ultimately you are your only competition. If you capture your market, generate prophets and/or change lives (based on your goals)… who cares what the next person is doing with their influence? We all have it. It’s a matter of what you do with it.

Now I put on my Sugar Free Coaching hat…
In every industry and for every generation, there are private companies that rate other companies. Just like some businesses suck, some ratings companies that score businesses also suck.

The BBB, which used to be a commercial staple in the US,  comes to mind. I was utterly disgusted when I found out you could buy your score. I’ve seen similar practices with some somedia companies and I’m over it.

Bottom line is, I don’t need a company that doesn’t understand me or my audience, to tell me I’m good. I can ask my family, friends, leaders, fans and clients directly. Why? Because they are all brilliant. Like minds think alike and attract other like minds and so on. Further more, giving good service and quality value add is personal to the consumer. Quality relationships are not to be measured by a computer without first at least asking the consumers vs. only people who use said rating company.

Everytime, I think I’m finished with this, an additional point surfaces…

Yes netiquette is important, as in “on ground” (vs. real life which some folks mistake for the opposite of online). You have to respect others (or don’t and experience the repurcussions). But outside of that, I can’t tell you how to be you. Your somedia activity is not going to look like mine, nor should it.

Sooo… I’m sorry social media friends. I call B.S.!!

You might want to dig a little deeper into your brand, if you plan to stick around for the long haul. If your whole vision is about rating the traffic on these very flawed mediums… you need to find another value add. Marketing is a very miniscule part of the formula to successful business and Social Media is an even smaller part of Marketing… this is still true for the somedia business.

Let’s discuss it… http://xeeme.com/AndréaRaquel

Humility is not driven by human opinion

#LivingSugarFree
Lesson in love, peace and the Law of Attraction.

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It goes both ways. When you step to someone because they have an opinion about something and tell them to live and let live… it is you who needs the lesson most.

In case you don’t know me, haven’t been paying attention or are just clueless; let me spell it out for you. If you didn’t notice before now… I am true to myself, my brand and my beliefs (not anyone else’s).

Soooo… don’t get too worked up, preachy or judgemental about anything I say.
A. I don’t care what you think about me.
B. I am consistently teaching in my lane.
C. Apparently I’m a jokster and everything I say has a comedic edge (I don’t try, didn’t plan it, it just is).

If you take the way I say something negatively, you probably should just decide not to listen rather than trying to coach me on how to be more like you. I’m only going to laugh you out. I probably don’t like you anyway and am certainly not trying to be like anyone else.

For the haters, before you even ask: Yes it’s Sunday. Yes I love the Lord. Yes I’m grateful and humble. No I’m not mad at you.

There it is.

Let’s discuss it… http://xeeme.com/AndréaRaquel